Bring Back Marino

Yesterday the Dolphins were not just beaten but humiliated by Culpepper and the Raiders at home despite Joey Porter guaranteeing a win. The loss served notice to the rest of the terrible teams in the league that the road to the number 1 draft pick next year runs through Miami. The fact that Joey Porter's guarantee to beat one of the worst teams in the league even made headlines showed how far the Dolphins have fallen and the fact that the team could not deliver proved there is still more disappointment to come. Also, Marino's touchdown record was broken by Favre, the Bills got their first win and your dog just died. This week I have two tips for the Dolphins.

1. Replace Trent Green with Dan Marino

The Dolphins are not losing because of Trent Green, but they are not winning because of him either. The season is lost and there is no use in throwing John Beck to the wolves just yet. The present is awful and the future must be protected. With that being said, we must try to save the only thing we have left; the past. Dan Marino never won a Super Bowl and those records are all he has left. If all Trent Green is going to do is mentor Beck while throwing 2 interceptions a game, Marino can do that, plus try to get some of his records back in the process. I know what some of you are thinking. "Dan Marino can't catch up to Favre." Given Favre's recent hot streak that's probably true, but what if something bad were to happen to him? Favre has never missed a start even through Katrina destroying his house, his wife's illness and his Father's passing, so clearly we can't rely on God to stop him. We should instead count on Joey Porter. 

2. Send Joey Porter to Kill Brett Favre 

 

The Dolphins have guaranteed Porter $20 million dollars and unlike his guarantees, theirs are legally binding. Joey Porter is only averaging 3 tackles per game with no sacks. When you compare that to this offseason, when he and three friends cowardly attacked a Bengals lineman in Vegas, it's pretty clear where he is most effective. On the field where there are people to block him, he is useless, but off the field, where other players are trying to relax and unwind, when Porter is allowed to bring a crew of friends, he has real superstar potential. We didn't pay Porter to make empty promises, we paid him to hurt opposing quarterbacks, and since he can't do that on the field anymore, he needs to man up and take some responsibility, starting with the murder of Brett Favre.